the past can be comforting. i keep finding myself going back to it. from time to time, i make a little progress and move a few steps forward but i find myself digressing back to the past sooner or later. sometimes i find more comfort in traumatizing memories from the past than i do in future memories to come. i guess my future scares me more than my past. i think that's why i welcome back people from the past--even the worst people from my past and when a good stranger walks into my life, i close myself off. there's comfort in the familiar--even if the familiar is a negative force in your life. how do i get myself out of the deep hole i dug for myself?