a blast from the past recently contacted me. the ex-husband of my ex-best friend of 8 years. our relationship was crazy; everything that happened between us was insane. i was 19 and practically dragged in against my will as the second wife in their marriage. i was best friends with kristie but robbie and i got close and that's when things went sour--or maybe they were sour from the start because kristie was a pathological liar. i feel i can say that with certainty now that i'm qualified to diagnose. but ever since this whole relationship, i've been jaded. i've had a harder time trusting people in general and the most obvious change is that i will keep a clear distance from all my friends boyfriends. any guy that may or may not be in a relationship is just out of the question. i don't need that baggage.

anyhow, robbie contacted me this week by facebook. i declined his request and he sent me a message of apology. what he's apologizing for, no one can be sure. there were a lot of lies on both his end and kristie's end and i never for a minute knew what to believe. she was telling me he was abusive, he was telling me she was a lesbian. in his message, i felt he wanted to delve into the past and i didn't want to go there. 4+ years ago and i see no need to go there. i kept my response brief; accusing "some of manipulating the situation." as for me, "i maintained my integrity throughout that whole relationship" and i think that's all that matters. i see no need to apologize. he's the one coming to me years later-- the guilt must be unbearable. i know he would have cheated on kristie if i went for it but i never did. they're divorced now from what i hear--no surprise there. i'm sure he cheated on her with someone else. he then wrote me back saying there was a lot he never told me that he should have. no thanks....i don't think i want to know. i'm in a better place now and i don't want to get dragged into that crap again. he said when he's back in LA, we might run into eachother because "fate has a way of doing that." i don't know if it's fate or hell that would bring us together. i can tell by the tone of his messages that he feels he made a huge mistake and he did. too little, too late. sometimes you make bad decisions and you lose people. and you're going to have to live with that because those people have self-respect and you can't blame them for that.